» June 24, 2006
The Top Five or Ten Best Games that are Awesome - Number Five
Well, after a long hiatus, Awesome Game Numero Fiveo is here. And that game is StarCraft. Yes, you might be wondering why I ended up picking this amongst classics like Red Alert, Warcraft, Age of Empires, or even the badass Warhammer 40k.
Simply put, StarCraft has the best characters and plot of all of those games, save for maybe Warcraft 3. All three playable races are stunningly awesome in their own right. The Terrans are sweet, the Zerg are sweeter, and the Protoss? Oh man. Dark Templars. Carriers. Archons. Fucking awesome, people. The storyline is pretty depressing but the voice acting is nice, and the characters are actually pretty damn cool.
With the one complaint that you can’t put AI players on your team in multiplayer, StarCraft is a fine game indeed. Sure, it’s hard as fuck. Sure, the computer is cheaper than shit. And yeah, it’s dated to beat shit. But come on. Every race has bad-fucking-ass units that most people would enjoy commanding in real life. I wouldn’t mind going over to Trotwood and finding those little shitbags that jumped me with a couple Hydralisks in hiding. And I think we can all agree that sending a squadron of Mutalisks or Guardians to Iraq would pretty much shut everyone up over there. A couple Yamato cannon blasts would really take care of our current government setup as well. Take that as a hint, future Democrats to be: Battlecruisers are our future, not some “no child left behind” bullshit. Fuck that, bitches.
Well, that’s all the time we have for today, because I need to go watch Star Trek: TNG. Bye.
greatest game ever . . . I wish I were a Terran.
Fuck that. I wish I were a fucking High Templar. Those are like the second fucking coolest units in any game ever...until they merge to become Dark Archons, which are the number one fucking coolest units in any game ever. Oh man.
And by the way, you are a Terran. A Terran civilian with 0 damage capabilites and only Armor 1 - Terran Infantry Armor. Sucks, doesn't it?
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